And a real one

Sorry, I also wanted to put out a real post. For those of you who have talked to me recently you might have realized that I'm having a pretty tough time here. Sometimes it feels like I just can't go one full day without something bad happening (4/7 days this week). I could lie and tell you all that it's easy to keep in high spirits and value every minute-- but yes, that would be a lie. So what does keep me going?

Recently I've had more luck integrating into my community. I am starting to make a few friends, and even though most of our interaction occurs over facebook I have high hopes that it will migrate to the real world. New store owners are starting to get to know me as I venture into new places, or meet other people who work at the same ones. Yesterday while buying cheese cloth I had a conversation (which I only 1/2 understood because I can't understand most males when they speak Shqip) about universities, studying and Eskimo culture. Just the other day an old friend and shop owner invited me behind the counter to have lunch with her and her 2 sons, yes one of her sons thought I was 19, but it was a quite enjoyable lunch.

And then there's the hope that I'm learning and gaining. Sometimes I do worry about the negatives that I will bring home (here I am sometimes less considerate to others in public places due to the lack of organization and need for pushiness), but there are many larger lessons that I hope will carry on. For instance, approaching organizations and communities at home should be easier, after all most of them will speak English. Surely now I am more able to roll with the punches (blender breaks, no problem! I'll hand grind, that doesn't work? Ok I'll try mashing, still no? I guess I'll just make an apple pie instead), I am forever learning that things will NEVER work out the way I plan (you think I would have learned this lesson a little better during my evacuation from Katrina but hey). I will take away patience which will be endlessly important in my future career (planning has lots of bureaucracy too).

Lastly there might just be a little bit of my personality involved. We all know how long I'll follow through on things (I was a phone survey person for 4 years, took piano lessons for 8 even though I wasn't ever really going anywhere with that), and I've always enjoyed a challenge. This challenge has yet to bring out the best in me as they usually do but I do believe in time.